A preacher wanted to raise money for his church and on being
told that there was a fortune in horse racing, decided to
purchase one and enter it in the races.  However at the local
auction, the going price for horses was so high that he ended up
buying a donkey instead.  He figured that since he had it, he
might as well go ahead and enter it in the races.  To his
surprise, the donkey came in third! The next day the local
paper carried this headline:

PREACHER'S ASS SHOWS

The preacher was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it
in the race again, and this time it won. The paper read:

PREACHER'S ASS OUT IN FRONT

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he
ordered the preacher not to enter the donkey in another race.
The paper headline read:

BISHOP SCRATCHES PREACHER'S ASS

This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the preacher to
get rid of the donkey.  The preacher decided to give it to a nun
in a nearby convent.  The paper headline the next day read:

NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN

The Bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to
get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for $10.00.
Next day the headline read:

NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10.00

This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy
back the donkey, lead it to the plains where it could run wild
and free. Next day, the headline in the paper read:

NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE

The Bishop was buried the next day.